“Laugh and the world laugh with you, snore and you sleep alone.”
Anthony Burgess
“Everything is funny, as long as it’s happening to somebody else.”
Will Rogers
“If you’re going to do something tonight that you’ll be sorry for tomorrow morning, sleep late.”
Henny Youngman
“Laziness is nothing more than the habit of resting before you get tired.”
Jules Renard
“No man has a good enough memory to be a successful liar.”
Abraham Lincoln
“Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else.”
Margaret Mead
“Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.”
George Burns
“A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.”
Steve Martin
“Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.”
Jim Carrey
“I may be drunk, Miss, but in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly.”
Winston Churchill
“Failure is the condiment that gives success its flavor.”
Truman Capote
“Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.”
Mark Twain
“Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive.”
Elbert Hubbard
“Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.”
Thomas Eddison
“A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.”
Steve Martin
If you try to fail and succeed, which have you done?
George Carlin
“You can’t wait for inspiration. You have to go after it with a club.”
Jack London
“Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds.”
Albert Einstein
“Life is like a sewer… what you get out of it depends on what you put into it.”
Tom Lehrer
“If you think you are too small to make a difference, try sleeping with a mosquito.”
Dalai Lama
“Well-behaved women seldom make history.”
Laurel Thatcher Ulrich